Tuesday 14 December 2010

Allow me.






I'd like to touch on a topic here, since this is a blog and people browse here from all over the world I'd like to get some input...

Ever notice that when a couple are together and decide to do something which from your point of view would benefit one over the other...? ever think that person holds the cards?

Or in our own Khaleeji societies. "Mstagwy 3ala mrtaaa? wala mstagwyaa 3ala raylhaa?"are common phrases. We intend to see one of those in a relationship as the follower and the other as the leader.

Kinda like one dominating the other...

I'm kinda facing a similar situation, kinda show's how our society is one big sexist hypocritical mess, my husband and I for example are going through a big change, and his extended family (Which from my point of view have no business with my life...but, would anyone listen if you tell them?) anyway...they keep telling him that "you don't have to do this?!" and other stuff...he got the gist of it though, he thinks that they don't want him in the follow-eee category of it.
When all in all, were just a couple that sit down and deal, yes! there are times when we had trouble in our marriage but It wasn't like "Hey I'm the better person here!" WTF! How could anyone base a relationship on that?!

Anyway my point here is that, people always persume that when the husband is making his wife happy! She's dominating him and vice versa...there is never love, respect, or understanding when these nobody's assess those unexpecting couples.

That's something I noticed about our societies, one is either submissive or dominant there is never an understanding of "Equality" in the formula.


Btw that picture, is from the new Disney movie "Tangled" GO SEE IT! Your gonna walk out with a grin on your face coz Disney's Back!! :D

Monday 13 December 2010

Paris-Part 4

Tap tap tap,

All he heard was his footsteps on the cold stone floor as he left the project site, loosening his tie and shirt buttons to breath a bit better, a smile on his face as he passed by the walkways and paths, contemplating what he would say and do when he see's her...

Down the corner he passed the all together familiar spot where they had sat for tea, his eyes twinkled at the memory, but his cheek hurt with it, he concluded that she had a bit of a breather for a couple of days but he still wanted to apologize and just be on his way.

He stepped into the lavish building, passed bill boys, and went into the reception area inquiring about her.
"Oui! Zee Mademoiselle is staying in suite 1021, Shall I call her?" the receptionist asked already picking up the phone to dial, at his nod she proceeded, with a little mumble here and there, she placed the phone down, glancing at him with a little smile and eyes that shown with curiosity.

But she did not ask much, "She asks if you will join her in zee suite." was all she said, and proceeded with giving him directions to the lady in question.

A manly blush stole to his cheeks but he said no more simply turned to the directions described, soon he would see her.
HIs steps were careful as he remembered the glittering intrigue in the receptionists eyes.

Women.

He sighed, finally reaching the tall white double doors at the far end of the wing, he knocked, and straightened, wanting to appear nonchalant but failed miserably.

He wasn't nonchalant at all, he wanted to see her, wanted to be make it good between them, but that was all he reasoned, none of his romantic self getting ahead of him.

When the door opened, it wasn't her but a tall blonde frenchman in gentlemanly garb, "Bonjour monsieur..." said the smiling man, and waved his hand inviting him in.

"Thank you 'Henry."said her sweet solemn voice just beyond to the valet, her hair down and about her this time, a simple lavender dress that contrasted with her hair and made her look...

What was that word she always used?!

Parisian.

He smiled at her, noting the ready made tea set and little girly biscuits, that he would never admit he liked.

"Hello."he said softly, as Henry bade a little bow and left, he noted she didn't reply to him just simply looked at him with her cheek cradled in her hand.

"I saw the news today. Your awfully charming when you want to be." she said already pouring her tea in her cup and not giving him the courtesy of pouring his.

"Look I'm sorry about the bit in the cafe...I came to apologize, I know I was an asshole in there." He said coming closer to stand beyond her, mentally noting her Marie Antoinette-isque living room, her bedroom he concluded must have been beyond the french doors behind her.

"Apology accepted."She said, "Would you like some tea?"she murmured, at his gulping nod she did his bidding, and he seemed more at ease after that.

"I remember you liked tea...all your life you kept giving it to me, I kept drinking it like a drug even though I hated the stuff!" he blurted.

Her dark lashed eyes widened, and a smile peaked at him from the corners of her mouth, "But you liked it!" she argued.

"Naah...I prefer coffee." He said waving his hand, "But I always drank it for you..."he said not comprehending what little secret he betrayed until he looked up at her and saw her eyes looking at him as if seeing him for the first time.

"I'll ring for coffee..."she said after a long moment of restoring her thoughts
"No need...If its here I'll have it, I'm not that picky." he shrugged picking up the cup and holding it in his palm and sipping the watery drink.

"I know."she murmured looking at him again with that same strange look, he just looked at her and smiled.

"Do you still write?"he asked her after finishing his tea, she raised her head as if reminded by something she long ago lost and abruptly shook her head.

"Oh lost interest?" He asked.

Her thin shoulders drew in a shrug, "Not much to write about."

"Oh...I'm sure you'll get it back, I remember you were really good at it." he said encourgingly.

"Truly?!" she asked him in earnest.

"Sure, you remember that story about the sailor who lived his whole life under the sea?"

"Oh yes! Haha what an imagination I had." she smiled.

"Yeah, I thought that was interesting the bit with him learning to breath oxygen through water...it goes against all logic, but I liked it."he said.

She smiled into his eyes and said no more, all the childhood memories, the thoughts of a whimsical girl and a rough edged boy who somehow just simply...parted.

"I'll write again...I'm sure I'll get my inspiration back somehow." She said smiling into his eyes.

He gave a light cough as if to clear his voice and said, "I'm sorry about your father."

Her eyes seemed to smolder at a memory and she just gave a nod in response,

After a moment she seemed to regain her wits and said in a voice tinged with emotion, as if trying her best not to cry in front of him, "My husband said something to me, you fight against the inevitable and when you loose to it, your simply left with grief, that is death." she finished quoting her other worldly husband.

"Were all going to die. How's that for the shorter version. " he said his eyes twinkling with merriment trying to get her out of her mood, and when she broke into her usual sunny smiles he knew he succeeded, though his dark joke would please very little people, but he knew he could always make her smile.

Silence.

But for the mutinous sound of a pair of eyes searching the other, slow and probing, his hand found hers and he ran his fingers through it, how he had imagined those same hands that he had worshipped, without thinking he touched her palm to his lips, breathing the subtle scent of her, pressing a kiss to her hand.

Fool.

His mind raged, and he straightened getting up to stand, unseen to him the crestfallen look on her expressive face, "I just remembered I've got to be somewhere....Goodbye."

and just like that he caught back some of his dignity and walked away.

Sunday 5 December 2010

A very late night, indeed.

Again, I fight for the right of rest, my favorite chair awaits, I could make a pot of tea and lay back with a good book and relax for once, but NO!

She denies me constantly, filling my ears with her wails of resentment, I cannot take it anymore, my arms hurt of so much carrying, I turn her night light on in hopes of her calming down.

"Stop...baby, mama's tired." I croon in a voice that was not mine.
"Bagatywagaababa!" she cried, a pout on her lips, tears in her eyes.
"Papa's asleep, I want to sleep, its your time to sleep."
"Nonononono!"she cried again.
"Alright...fine." I put her back in the crib and let her cry it out, putting my hands over my ears to stop her shrieks from effecting my eardrums.

I turn my gaze away, willing myself not to make eye contact, as she peeks at me weakly from beyond the bars, then that insolent little grin sweeps her face and I'm faced with a...

Demon!

I clamp my mouth shut, start for the door, I hear her wails begging me to stay, but I carry on downstairs put my ear phones on climbing down the stairs intent on fixing me a meal...

15 minutes later...

I cannot hear her, I grin with self satisfaction reach for my book, and drink out of my favorite cup, then I hear her again...

"Mama..."

"Mama..."

"Mama..."

Her wails turn broken, a tone I never heard before, she's usually such a brat, I climb up the stairs once more and when I look into her crib, I see tears on her cheeks, her blanket clutched in her tiny fist and a sweet mumble of "Mama..." on her lips.

"I love you too." I whisper smoothing her miniature curles, a tug at my heart and tears of my own threatening to come out, I kiss her brow and soon she's asleep.

:')


Okay...tea's turning cold XD

Friday 3 December 2010

Paris- Part 3

She was still fuming when she got back to her hotel suite, her hands were fists at her sides, swiftly pulling off her white coat and bag and flinging it on the empty chair by the corner, her mind was reeling with his words of sarcastic disapproval.

He had no right to judge her.

It took her an hour of basking in the bless of a bubble bath and having some fine chocolate ice cream to bring her out of the those negative thoughts.

She should just forget him, it was a miracle enough she had seen him again what are the chances of meeting him once more.

Good riddance.

She chuckled to herself, it was indeed a lot of fun to see that stunned reaction on his face after she had slapped him.

Serves you right.

But her heart had almost beaten out of her chest at seeing him again, it was like a walk down memory lane, thinking back on they're time together, Oh she did understand his hurt.

But its been a long time ago, she should just-

Forget him.

I did. She replied to the voice in her head.

No you didn't.

He keeps coming back into my life.

Keep him out of it! Your a grown woman now!

She sighed in reply, clicked on the news and rolled on her stomach,switched channels until she found one she could understand, she settled for the news and a reporter speaking in english to a foreigner.

"So, the reconstruction of the Louvre! That must be a challenge!" she said with obvious appreciation in her eyes to the male specimen in front of her.

When the camera turned to the man in question, she did a double take, her mind blanking without any thought, her eyes entirely focused on the all together familiar face in the screen beyond.

Him.

Tall, Dark, Unbelievably handsome in that black suit.

"I do hope that is not a tone of worry, Mademoiselle Anne." He joked flashing his easy white smile, "Do not fret, there are tons of experts backing this project, however it is indeed challenging, our only hope is to improve the workings of such a historic institution without changing the structure in anyway." He continued more seriously.

It took a bit more of questions and answers for her to get the grasp of the matter, and she just laid there in a humiliated mass.

Here was a person who went out for his dreams, here was a person who stood there with an easy grace, of a laid back smile as if telling the world with no words necessary "Hey, I won."

Here was a man.

And she felt smaller and smaller with every realization ; when she had settled for being the child bride of a man twice her age, he was seeking the world for a place to call his own, fighting his demons until he reached his goals, dreaming dreams and achieving them.

How insignificant and petty she must have looked to him.


Slowly without a sound, tears of sadness fell down her cheeks, and she was swept in the guilt and regret she felt for her life.



To be continued.