Tuesday 14 December 2010

Allow me.






I'd like to touch on a topic here, since this is a blog and people browse here from all over the world I'd like to get some input...

Ever notice that when a couple are together and decide to do something which from your point of view would benefit one over the other...? ever think that person holds the cards?

Or in our own Khaleeji societies. "Mstagwy 3ala mrtaaa? wala mstagwyaa 3ala raylhaa?"are common phrases. We intend to see one of those in a relationship as the follower and the other as the leader.

Kinda like one dominating the other...

I'm kinda facing a similar situation, kinda show's how our society is one big sexist hypocritical mess, my husband and I for example are going through a big change, and his extended family (Which from my point of view have no business with my life...but, would anyone listen if you tell them?) anyway...they keep telling him that "you don't have to do this?!" and other stuff...he got the gist of it though, he thinks that they don't want him in the follow-eee category of it.
When all in all, were just a couple that sit down and deal, yes! there are times when we had trouble in our marriage but It wasn't like "Hey I'm the better person here!" WTF! How could anyone base a relationship on that?!

Anyway my point here is that, people always persume that when the husband is making his wife happy! She's dominating him and vice versa...there is never love, respect, or understanding when these nobody's assess those unexpecting couples.

That's something I noticed about our societies, one is either submissive or dominant there is never an understanding of "Equality" in the formula.


Btw that picture, is from the new Disney movie "Tangled" GO SEE IT! Your gonna walk out with a grin on your face coz Disney's Back!! :D

Monday 13 December 2010

Paris-Part 4

Tap tap tap,

All he heard was his footsteps on the cold stone floor as he left the project site, loosening his tie and shirt buttons to breath a bit better, a smile on his face as he passed by the walkways and paths, contemplating what he would say and do when he see's her...

Down the corner he passed the all together familiar spot where they had sat for tea, his eyes twinkled at the memory, but his cheek hurt with it, he concluded that she had a bit of a breather for a couple of days but he still wanted to apologize and just be on his way.

He stepped into the lavish building, passed bill boys, and went into the reception area inquiring about her.
"Oui! Zee Mademoiselle is staying in suite 1021, Shall I call her?" the receptionist asked already picking up the phone to dial, at his nod she proceeded, with a little mumble here and there, she placed the phone down, glancing at him with a little smile and eyes that shown with curiosity.

But she did not ask much, "She asks if you will join her in zee suite." was all she said, and proceeded with giving him directions to the lady in question.

A manly blush stole to his cheeks but he said no more simply turned to the directions described, soon he would see her.
HIs steps were careful as he remembered the glittering intrigue in the receptionists eyes.

Women.

He sighed, finally reaching the tall white double doors at the far end of the wing, he knocked, and straightened, wanting to appear nonchalant but failed miserably.

He wasn't nonchalant at all, he wanted to see her, wanted to be make it good between them, but that was all he reasoned, none of his romantic self getting ahead of him.

When the door opened, it wasn't her but a tall blonde frenchman in gentlemanly garb, "Bonjour monsieur..." said the smiling man, and waved his hand inviting him in.

"Thank you 'Henry."said her sweet solemn voice just beyond to the valet, her hair down and about her this time, a simple lavender dress that contrasted with her hair and made her look...

What was that word she always used?!

Parisian.

He smiled at her, noting the ready made tea set and little girly biscuits, that he would never admit he liked.

"Hello."he said softly, as Henry bade a little bow and left, he noted she didn't reply to him just simply looked at him with her cheek cradled in her hand.

"I saw the news today. Your awfully charming when you want to be." she said already pouring her tea in her cup and not giving him the courtesy of pouring his.

"Look I'm sorry about the bit in the cafe...I came to apologize, I know I was an asshole in there." He said coming closer to stand beyond her, mentally noting her Marie Antoinette-isque living room, her bedroom he concluded must have been beyond the french doors behind her.

"Apology accepted."She said, "Would you like some tea?"she murmured, at his gulping nod she did his bidding, and he seemed more at ease after that.

"I remember you liked tea...all your life you kept giving it to me, I kept drinking it like a drug even though I hated the stuff!" he blurted.

Her dark lashed eyes widened, and a smile peaked at him from the corners of her mouth, "But you liked it!" she argued.

"Naah...I prefer coffee." He said waving his hand, "But I always drank it for you..."he said not comprehending what little secret he betrayed until he looked up at her and saw her eyes looking at him as if seeing him for the first time.

"I'll ring for coffee..."she said after a long moment of restoring her thoughts
"No need...If its here I'll have it, I'm not that picky." he shrugged picking up the cup and holding it in his palm and sipping the watery drink.

"I know."she murmured looking at him again with that same strange look, he just looked at her and smiled.

"Do you still write?"he asked her after finishing his tea, she raised her head as if reminded by something she long ago lost and abruptly shook her head.

"Oh lost interest?" He asked.

Her thin shoulders drew in a shrug, "Not much to write about."

"Oh...I'm sure you'll get it back, I remember you were really good at it." he said encourgingly.

"Truly?!" she asked him in earnest.

"Sure, you remember that story about the sailor who lived his whole life under the sea?"

"Oh yes! Haha what an imagination I had." she smiled.

"Yeah, I thought that was interesting the bit with him learning to breath oxygen through water...it goes against all logic, but I liked it."he said.

She smiled into his eyes and said no more, all the childhood memories, the thoughts of a whimsical girl and a rough edged boy who somehow just simply...parted.

"I'll write again...I'm sure I'll get my inspiration back somehow." She said smiling into his eyes.

He gave a light cough as if to clear his voice and said, "I'm sorry about your father."

Her eyes seemed to smolder at a memory and she just gave a nod in response,

After a moment she seemed to regain her wits and said in a voice tinged with emotion, as if trying her best not to cry in front of him, "My husband said something to me, you fight against the inevitable and when you loose to it, your simply left with grief, that is death." she finished quoting her other worldly husband.

"Were all going to die. How's that for the shorter version. " he said his eyes twinkling with merriment trying to get her out of her mood, and when she broke into her usual sunny smiles he knew he succeeded, though his dark joke would please very little people, but he knew he could always make her smile.

Silence.

But for the mutinous sound of a pair of eyes searching the other, slow and probing, his hand found hers and he ran his fingers through it, how he had imagined those same hands that he had worshipped, without thinking he touched her palm to his lips, breathing the subtle scent of her, pressing a kiss to her hand.

Fool.

His mind raged, and he straightened getting up to stand, unseen to him the crestfallen look on her expressive face, "I just remembered I've got to be somewhere....Goodbye."

and just like that he caught back some of his dignity and walked away.

Sunday 5 December 2010

A very late night, indeed.

Again, I fight for the right of rest, my favorite chair awaits, I could make a pot of tea and lay back with a good book and relax for once, but NO!

She denies me constantly, filling my ears with her wails of resentment, I cannot take it anymore, my arms hurt of so much carrying, I turn her night light on in hopes of her calming down.

"Stop...baby, mama's tired." I croon in a voice that was not mine.
"Bagatywagaababa!" she cried, a pout on her lips, tears in her eyes.
"Papa's asleep, I want to sleep, its your time to sleep."
"Nonononono!"she cried again.
"Alright...fine." I put her back in the crib and let her cry it out, putting my hands over my ears to stop her shrieks from effecting my eardrums.

I turn my gaze away, willing myself not to make eye contact, as she peeks at me weakly from beyond the bars, then that insolent little grin sweeps her face and I'm faced with a...

Demon!

I clamp my mouth shut, start for the door, I hear her wails begging me to stay, but I carry on downstairs put my ear phones on climbing down the stairs intent on fixing me a meal...

15 minutes later...

I cannot hear her, I grin with self satisfaction reach for my book, and drink out of my favorite cup, then I hear her again...

"Mama..."

"Mama..."

"Mama..."

Her wails turn broken, a tone I never heard before, she's usually such a brat, I climb up the stairs once more and when I look into her crib, I see tears on her cheeks, her blanket clutched in her tiny fist and a sweet mumble of "Mama..." on her lips.

"I love you too." I whisper smoothing her miniature curles, a tug at my heart and tears of my own threatening to come out, I kiss her brow and soon she's asleep.

:')


Okay...tea's turning cold XD

Friday 3 December 2010

Paris- Part 3

She was still fuming when she got back to her hotel suite, her hands were fists at her sides, swiftly pulling off her white coat and bag and flinging it on the empty chair by the corner, her mind was reeling with his words of sarcastic disapproval.

He had no right to judge her.

It took her an hour of basking in the bless of a bubble bath and having some fine chocolate ice cream to bring her out of the those negative thoughts.

She should just forget him, it was a miracle enough she had seen him again what are the chances of meeting him once more.

Good riddance.

She chuckled to herself, it was indeed a lot of fun to see that stunned reaction on his face after she had slapped him.

Serves you right.

But her heart had almost beaten out of her chest at seeing him again, it was like a walk down memory lane, thinking back on they're time together, Oh she did understand his hurt.

But its been a long time ago, she should just-

Forget him.

I did. She replied to the voice in her head.

No you didn't.

He keeps coming back into my life.

Keep him out of it! Your a grown woman now!

She sighed in reply, clicked on the news and rolled on her stomach,switched channels until she found one she could understand, she settled for the news and a reporter speaking in english to a foreigner.

"So, the reconstruction of the Louvre! That must be a challenge!" she said with obvious appreciation in her eyes to the male specimen in front of her.

When the camera turned to the man in question, she did a double take, her mind blanking without any thought, her eyes entirely focused on the all together familiar face in the screen beyond.

Him.

Tall, Dark, Unbelievably handsome in that black suit.

"I do hope that is not a tone of worry, Mademoiselle Anne." He joked flashing his easy white smile, "Do not fret, there are tons of experts backing this project, however it is indeed challenging, our only hope is to improve the workings of such a historic institution without changing the structure in anyway." He continued more seriously.

It took a bit more of questions and answers for her to get the grasp of the matter, and she just laid there in a humiliated mass.

Here was a person who went out for his dreams, here was a person who stood there with an easy grace, of a laid back smile as if telling the world with no words necessary "Hey, I won."

Here was a man.

And she felt smaller and smaller with every realization ; when she had settled for being the child bride of a man twice her age, he was seeking the world for a place to call his own, fighting his demons until he reached his goals, dreaming dreams and achieving them.

How insignificant and petty she must have looked to him.


Slowly without a sound, tears of sadness fell down her cheeks, and she was swept in the guilt and regret she felt for her life.



To be continued.

Tuesday 23 November 2010

Now you see me, now you dont.

Good-afternoon.

I know I've been invisible on here, but with my life changing and turning into a million different directions its really hard to stay focused on my blog.

I love it here, I adore just writing whatever that comes to mind and posting it here, and actually getting responses! Anyhow...
I've been sick this past week, my daughter caught the flu. :(
I hate it when I get sick, I'm too lazy to do anything.

Anyway, I told my mom finally about my posts here, and she kept encouraging me to continue, So here I am. :)
I know I've been away for so long and some of you probably have given up on this little page O'mine, but I'm back.

I'm thinking of continuing that Paris story for the heck of it, I don't want it to be open ended like that. :S
I'd appreciate some suggestions! with me sitting in bed and not having much to do, it would be heaven to hear from you guys,
Thanks.

Sunday 17 October 2010

Arabian Beauty.

I've just started catching up on my Ramadan shows, and I've been watching this series called "AlMrgab" not typically into beduin shows, but the leading lady is so so so so so beautiful! mb 6abee3y! I know typical females are going to say, makeup and filters and whatever but even so! She's amazingly good looking, and catches that age old look. The kind you'd picture in olden arab times.The eyes, the nose, the mouth, the hair. My dad is in his 60's and basically the kinda guy who'd watch the news, sports and read the paper, not at all into music videos and modern arab celebrities and he turned to me and said "Who's that?!" LOL.


This is Nadia Odeh,



(Nadia Also happens to be one of my favorite names, LOL I know people are going to think M2saa! coz I get that all the time when I mention I like the name, I don't know why people are turning away from such beautiful old names btw, Its better than Tala or whatever...Sorry, no offence to those who like those kinda names, but you'd probably disagree with me anyways. :P)

What do you guys think? Do I have taste or what! Btw I'm not a lesbian or anything, happily married and straight! I have this great appreciation for female beauty is all.

Monday 11 October 2010

There was a boy. -Paris-Part 2

*There maybe some sexual tension below so...be nice to me. :P



He was angry, he had to hide his feelings well for now, he looked at her from the corner of his eyes and thought two words.

Damn you.

He had lost all control when he noticed that rock on her finger, it had made him see red, to find out that she had indeed belonged to another.

He soon saw that she had returned to her normal self, ordering herself a cup of tea, and when she inquired about his preference he shrugged and said simply, "I'll have the same."

The thoughts in his head was burning him, how she held her menu with her small dainty hands, how her soft dark hair fell into cascades over her shoulder, her soft lips forming a pout.

And
How such beauty left him for an old man.
It made him fume.

The thought of wrinkled old hands over her delectable body -or any hands for that matter- made his blood boil, That at least he could draw satisfaction from, she looked like an innocent, still untapped with a mans passion.
She'd probably gasp with the idea's he had in his head of her.


Ah.
But he wouldn't think it anymore, it didn't matter that when he touched her hand he was reminded of lush silken bed sheets, how her cheeks were warm and soft.

He wondered if the rest of her was as soft.

Don't think. Don't think.

Besides there were many others now, he was never vain but he knew he could have any woman if he put some effort into it, at least he'd put that effort into a girl that wouldn't leave him for an old baldy.

There he goes again...All women were always compared to her.

He racked a hand through his hair, something he did when he was nervous, and he noticed that she just smiled at the way he fidgeted in his seat.

Women.

He heard her ask about his family and he dismissed the question, he wasn't going to sit there and act all civilized when she was the one that dumped him.

No.

He wouldn't make it that easy.

"So it was the money."he mused aloud watching her fidget in her seat, holding her cup of tea and pretending to drink it to buy some time.

Ha.

Who was in control now?!

"My father wanted us to marry...I simply consented." she shrugged, as if throwing her life away was perfectly acceptable.

"Your father is an idiot."he said looking into her eyes meaningfully, "And your an even bigger one."

She looked away trying to fight for some self control, "Was." she whispered.

"Beg your pardon?"he said leaning in his cocky brow an inch higher.

She looked into his eyes tears threatening to spill once more, "He was...He passed away two weeks ago. Thats the main reason I'm here, I couldn't stay back at home because everything constantly reminded me of him, so I booked a way out." She finished gesturing to the place about her, an angry ache in her chest.

He just stared, his mouth slightly open.

Asshole.

Thats the only word that came to mind when he came about to describing himself at that moment.

"If your through throwing insults at me..."She said rising up from her chair and slapping a few euros on the table, "I know I am. " she said picking up her bag intending to head out.

"Why would someone like you settle for marrying an old man?"he said rising as well, resting his hands on the table to be more on her level, he looked to her eye to eye.

"You are his second wife. You are second in priority...there is nothing a man like that would want from a girl like you except..."he trailed on he couldn't bring himself to say it.

Sex

He watched the play of emotions on her expressive face, and his gaze softened she had lost someone so dear to her, settled for so little in life and had the misfortune of meeting him now and here of all times and places.

I loved you.

He had wanted to say it, but he didn't too much anger and pride forbade him to utter anymore words.

He watched her drop her bag to the table and raise her hand as if trying to smack something...

Hmmm.


SLAP.

With that she stalked off into the streets, as he watched her go he rubbed his aching cheek wincing at the full unexpected blow he had just received.

He deserved that.

He had no right to sit her through and call about her choices, but he had wanted to hurt her a bit...a small twisted part of him needed that.

It was right after that , that The waiter had come back to get the used cups and teapot, seemingly on to what had transpired, "Les femmes sont folles!!" he said turning his finger round and round against the side of his head.

He knew what that meant alright, Heh. Boy, you have no idea!

A hand still resting on his cheek as he looked out at the grand hotel at the corner, a mental thought in his head that he would go back and apologize to her later.

Monday 4 October 2010

There was a girl- Paris- Part 2







She walked on swiftly past the many passers, moving on towards a safe haven, she was so shocked she couldn't even pull her mind together to stay as serene and ladylike as she usually was.

How could it be?!

It was ages ago, years have passed yet the image of him in her mind stayed imprinted for so long, and when she saw him back there he looked for all the world like an older version of his nonchalant self, yet he seemed much more still...

Broken.

Just like she was, she realized it now, they were both pieces of two twin vases that the world knocked over.

Fear, circumstances, bad choices.

And her.

She shouldn't even dwell on it anymore, so he was here....so what!

She should just ignore the little setback and go on enjoying herself, she was a self centered bitch after all, at least thats what anyone would think after what she did to him.

With a sure slow walk she continued back to her five stare hotel on the corner of the impeccable street, unbeknownst to her that he was behind her, walking towards her with a firm resolve.

"Wait!" he called out.
And she stopped, her mind reeling at the sound of his voice, her eyes closing for a moment relishing the sound of him once more.

So he was real.

She turned slowly, with a rise of her chin, looking onto his eyes searchingly, she waited for him to close the distance and when he did, her heart twisted at the feelings he awakened within her.

"Hello."He said though he seemed to hesitate on what to say, perhaps feeling awkward on what to do now, and she found herself utterly charmed by the little boy quality in him.

She gave a shaky nod, and with a gulp replied softly to his greeting, though her hands clasped and unclasped at her fine leather bag handle.

His eyes looked into her face then roved boldly down the length of her, registering her jeweled finger in the process.
"Who is he?" he asked nodding towards the big diamond, his eyes showing the hurt of her betrayal .

"No one you know." she said scoffing at the question, turning sideways intending to flee once more, he grabbed her arm turning her towards him, mindless of the gawking passers go by, "Try me." he hissed.

With that warning she whispered a name, and recognition flickered in his eyes, "The son or father?" he asked sickened.
"Father." she replied feeling her self sinking more in his eyes.

When he raised his eyes to hers again a sneer plastered itself on his handsome face, and he shoved her back a midst the shouts of "Monsieur!!" probably begrudging him manhandling her.

Freshly new with pain, a tear fell unheeded down her cheek this time she did not turn away, she stood there watching him watch her with churning emotions.

Why did I let you go.

She could feel him trying to gain control of his emotions sending his hand to run through his soft dark hair he turned once more towards her and mumbled "Sorry..."
He stepped closer still, this time his hand touched her cheek a finger brushing away her tear, his eyes masked from any emotion "Would you mind joining me for tea? Its been so long..."he said his husky voice sending shivers down her spine, with another shaky nod she complied placing her hand in his and relishing the warmth of him.

With that she walked by his side and crossed the street to the cafe beyond, all silent companionship after the storm of they're reunion.

Friday 1 October 2010

There was a boy. -Paris-

This goes to *L, hope you like this one. ;*.



He had come here on a business trip with a colleague, had kept a grim face all together through the trip, he did not care to be reminded of luxuries and places he was not to see or have.

He had a practical mindset, he did not want to go there, did not want to play the part of the traveling waif, he would rather stay in his desert country and steer away from things he was not to know.

But...

Deep down he thought.

Why not?

And so he had come.
By god, he had wanted to see it.

And when he had arrived surrounded by picturesque streets, a cloudy sky without the glare of the sun, tree's on every bend, he became energetic.

Suddenly the nonchalant mood he was in melted away and he could only smile wistfully at the beauty that surrounded him.

Since it had been a long flight and he was not one to sit in a hotel room and anticipate tomorrow, he decided to come out and break out of his jet lag.

Walking down elegant pathways, bends, and down numerous shops he stopped to look up at one the mannequins that looked back at him through the window enticing him to come in.
he lit his cigarette, placed it firmly between his lips, and placed his hands in his pockets, thinking that the dress would probably look nice on his nagging little sister, she'd probably give him a thrashing for coming back empty handed anyways.

Figuring he should get the dreaded business of going shopping over with, he was about to just do that, when he heard a sharp intake of breath on his right.
Idly he glanced at the intruder then he turned again, not believing his eyes.

No.
It couldn't be.

Slowly gulping back his surprise he turned at her fully, his cynic mind quickly registering her changed appearance, gone was his curly haired bookworm and in her place was something other...

She never wore her hair up like that, a tight ponytail that swept her hair back exposing her angelic face, she was dressed in a matching dress and spring coat.
he thought she looked endearing, how she stood there, her hands in her pockets looking at him like he was death come to break through her perfect world, how fitting he thought, how she wore white and he had come in black just as she had left him to be.

Sorry darling.

He looked at her and finally around her taking in what she had accomplished, well, she had always known what she had wanted, he had always liked that about her.

But when he finally looked back into her eyes, he found her shaking, her own dark heavy lashed eyes staring at him searchingly, terrified.
Like a deer caught in the headlights.

He almost gave away a smile of satisfaction at having her finally thwarted, but she had looked so defeated that he slowly turned his icy stare to soften.

But it was too late she had already ran away.

Thursday 30 September 2010

Today I was GUTTED.

Yes.
Completely.
It was all jokes and good fun and I was wondering about how my daughters cousin who's a new baby boy would be celebrated on his birthday?
I was only making fun of course. In reality I couldn't care less.

And they were like "Laaysh el3n9ryaa? Y3ny wa elbanat shlon?"
So I was like "3addy I still didn't properly celebrate H's birthday bs Inshalla its happening."
and they were like "Laa e7naa ma nfrg bnt wala walad...o mdry aish." seriously shda5aal!! Excuse me this is coming from people who ridicule my female cousins who have studied abroad, drive they're on cars! Get a career before getting married!! Come on!! I know they're sexist freaks! And racist as well. I never call a black person the n word, and they do all the time!! And I'm sexist o afarg!! I couldn't reply because this was all said in a very humorous fashion so of course I couldn't get on my oh so serious attitude. I'd be a spoil sport o of course end up being in the wrong. I mean I was like coz he's the only boy and suddenly I'm a sexist!! I grew up as the eldest between girls! I don't have any brothers! O mafrgaat 3ndy!
Screw you.

Y3ny seriously gutted elyom!! more like speared. Who are you to judge!!



I hate venting here bs 9j got out of hand today, I was ripped through my very belief!! :(

Ode to Audrey.


I have always adored Audrey Hepburn, ever since I was little and I'd see her face in posters and magazine I'd think "Wow, she's so pretty."
Back then I didn't realize what an icon she was, until a friend of mine came by my house with cake and an old "My fair lady" tape, I was hooked ever since.

I used to buy everything I could with her name on it, I remember there was a Christie's auction event, and they had her things on display to be auctioned.
I remember telling my dad I had to have a piece of her, "She's not totally gone!" I remember thinking, I was so hopeful in getting something that I could treasure from such an amazing woman's life.
Anyhow In the end I didn't get anything.
But hey! I still got the movies right?!



Needless to say The Givenchy gown Audrey wore in Breakfast At Tiffany's sold for 1Million$.

Blogs, surfs, and surveys. :P

Has anyone tried one of those surveys?
Anyway here's 1 I've done. :)




Ten how’s:
1. How did you get one of your scars?
Surgery, C-section.

2. How did you celebrate your last birthday?
With my hubby, candle lit dinner with roses. :)

3. How are you feeling at this moment?
Idle.

4. How did your night go last night?
Hectic, with the baby crying, and hubby screaming for her to shut up.

5. How did you do in high school?
Average, Hated going there.

6. How did you get the shirt you’re wearing?
Bought.

7. How often do you see your best friend(s)?
Honestly? I barely see them anymore. :(

8. How much money did you spend last month?
Hmm A lot! :S

9. How old do you want to be when you get married?
I'm already married.

10. How old will you be at your next birthday?
Age doesn't matter. :P

1. Your mother’s name?
Angel.

2. What did you do last weekend?
Spent it mostly in my kitchen. :D

3. What is the most important part of your life
My daughter, career, and family.

4. What would you rather be doing?
Traveling, getting away from people that bother me.

5. What did you last cry over?
Life, things blowing against me, feeling lonesome.

6. What always makes you feel better when you’re upset?
Maybe reading a good book in a bubble filled tub.

7. What’s the most important thing you look for in a significant other?
Flexibility, understanding.

8. What are you worried about?
A lot of things! The move, if I'll be working, how would our new place look like with the budget I have, if I'd move our furniture there, or would I need to go shopping for new stuff. :(

9. What did you have for breakfast?
I'm afraid I went straight to lunch today, woke up late. :S

Eight you’s:
1. Have you ever liked someone who had a girlfriend/boyfriend?
Sure.

2. Have you ever had your heartbroken?
Yes.

3. Have you ever been out of your country?
Yes.

4. Have you ever done something outrageously dumb
Lots of times! :S

5. Have you ever been back stabbed by a friend?
HA! Lets just say A lot is an understatement.

6. Have you ever had sex on the beach?
No.

7. Have you ever dated someone younger than you?
No.

8. Have you ever read an entire book in one day?
Yes.

Seven who’s:

1. Who was the last person you saw?
My husband.

2. Who was the last person you texted?
A friend.

3. Who was the last person you hung out with?
My Aunt and cousin.

4. Who was the last person to call you?
I think my Mom.

5. Who did you last hug?
I don't hug.

6. Who is the last person who texted you?
My mom.

7. Who was the last person you said “I love you” to?
Hubby.

Six where’s:
1. Where does your best friend(s) live?
Bahrain.

2. Where did you last go?
Upstairs.

3. Where did you last hang out?
A coffee shop in Khobar.

4. Where did/do you go to school?
Bahrain.

5. Where is your favorite place to be?
On an open porch with the rain falling beyond, and a tea pot on the table next to me. :)

6. Where did you sleep last night?
My house, Bed.

Five do’s:
1. Do you think anyone likes you?
Sure.

2. Do you ever wish you were someone else?
Hmm, There are things I wish I had which other people have but I wouldn't change myself for it.

3. Do you know the muffin man?
No, is he edible?

4. Does the future scare you?
Terrifies but excites me.

5. Do your parents know about your blog?
NO. :P

Four why’s:
1. Why are you best friends with your best friends?
Because we connect.

2. Why did you get into Blogging?
I was depressed and found it was a good place to heal.

3. Why did your parents give you the name you have?
Well my mom choose it even though my dad wanted a really traditional name for me. Thanks Mom!! But my mom wanted it because she liked how it sounded and the meaning just made her decide. :)

4. Why are you doing this survey?
Spare time.

Three if’s:
1. If you could have one super power what would it be?
walk through iron walls? Maybe I could rob a bank! :P

2. If you could go back in time and change one thing, would you?
Yes and No.

3. If you were stranded on a deserted island and could bring 1 thing, what would you bring?
A gun probably, and ammo.

Two would-you-ever’s:
1. Would you ever get back together with any of your ex’s if they asked you?
I don't have ex's. El7mdalla.

2. Would you ever shave your head to save someone you love?
How would that signify? :P

One last question:
1. Are you happy with your life right now?
El7mdalla it is going for the better inshalla, but I'd minus some of the people in it. There is a lot of things I could've done differently, but I'm sure everything would turn out good in the end.

Monday 27 September 2010

There was a girl. -Paris-

She was away for the summer, her darling husband has shipped her off to spend a week in Paris where she could recuperate after her fathers death.
She was an entity of sadness, her eyes losing they're fiery spark, she was used to these streets, used to the many boutiques that were placed along the sidelines, and the ridiculously priced items within.
She had that one.
She had that.
Oh, and that one as well.

She continued to survey her usual surroundings for anything new.
And that was when she spotted him.

It couldn't be.
Dressed down in jeans and a black t-shirt, he looked just like she remembered.
Only he looked taller now...some how more arresting.

He bit his cigarette between his teeth as always, looking up at one of the more upscale boutiques contemplating a dress he saw, his hands tucked in his pockets in serene disposal.
No doubt to give a love interest of his.

She was just about to leave to tiptoe such an awkward encounter, but he had turned and she was lost in him once more.

His expression was silent boredom as he eyed her but then recognition flickered in the depth of those beautiful eyes of his, and he turned fully towards her taken aback.

Oh god!

She gulped back a sob as his eyes dancing around her sarcastically, registering that she had gotten what she wanted after all, but she couldn't hold back her tears.
For the world was dark around her,
her one family beneath the hot ground and -him a link to her past was here in front of her, in the present.

She felt old, bed ridden, and weak to step out of this haunting shadow alone.
She ached at the memories then.
Ached for what she had let go.

She gave a shuddering sob and turned away, not seeing his softening gaze through the haze of tears.

She fled.



____________________________________

To those of you wondering. Yes! this is a continuation from the previous story -there was once a boy/girl- let me knw if you want me to continue this, and your thoughts on the matter in how it should end :D

Wednesday 22 September 2010

Happy Birthday, A.

Oh my love, how you've grown. Little A.

I knew you in the gardens, where you hid behind bushes, I knew you in the kitchen where you stole my cookies, I knew you in my room when you borrowed all my clothes.

Oh little A. How you've grown.

I miss you, my darling, your all of twenty two, how a number is so lucky to have you knocking on its door.
I love you as much as I have said "I hate you." And I did say it all through my years with you.

A younger sister of mine, your silky hair falling over your eyes, your eyes sparkling with laughter, your math books all in tatters with your careless drawings.
Oh naughty one.

You were the sun, you shined so brightly I hated it, for everyone knew me through you, everyone said "Hey! Your A's sister, aren't you?!" And I'd boil with anger at that.
HaHa.

But how can you help it? when I stood in your shadow, and refused to move out of it, when I sat in my room reading my novels where you were out making real adventures?

You were brave enough to fall in love, A.
I was afraid of it.

You were out before me, you were under the door, flying a punch at anyone who'd wrong me.
You were there.

I remember. You still cared.

And now your off to see the world, no one to stop you.
And yet.

That child in you died a little hasn't it? So have I,A.
The child in me is fallen, wrapped in a cage.
The world is ugly, A.
Keep me young.
You remember when you said it?
"I don't want to grow up!"
Well guess what A! So do I!
I want to be here, I want us to laugh, and run, and play.
I don't want to be grounded anymore.
Take me with you, A.
Don't go.
Don't go.

Nightly headaches.

I sat down today, trying not to think of you.

Oh greatest of worries.
I cannot speak. Or look. Or Listen.
I cannot concentrate or focus.
You are everywhere.
In the deepest darkness of my head.
In the deepest bowls of my heart.
In the pit of my stomach.
I tire.
I try.
I want to know the answer.

Oh wish I may, grant the wish I make today.
I want a book of answers.
Of spoken messages of truth.
I want to wonder no longer.

I want to know the truth.

Will it be grand? My future?
Would I fly to the moon?
Oh greatest worries, ease my pain.
Ease this head you bounce on and cease.

Wish I may, grant this wish I make today.

Make me happy.
Make me gay.

Greatest of worries, go and disarray.


PLEASE OH PLEASE OH PLEASE.

Thursday 9 September 2010

Cousin W

I hereby proclaim that I have the most destructive, crazy ass cousin on the planet.
No, I am not kidding, this post is a 100% true.

She's a maniac.

Cousin W, was always on the sidelines, she'd play with us girls for the sake of it, "There's nothing better to do." she'd say, but when there's an outing or her brothers are back into town to treat her, she'd fling us against the wall and run out skipping.

She was the girl with the messy hair, watchful eyes and the tell tail tongue, she'd always make up things about us and report it to the grown ups.

Back then, we did not know who the culprit was, for we had this idea that "5aly knows everything. A little bird told him." A little conniving ,treacherous bird that was cousin W.

And then Cousin W became 15, UH OH.

Yes, now all the boys we were crushing on Cousin W knew all about it and would run to Mama, "Shoofy banatch 3amty...mayst7oon!"

And Mama would come scream at us like its judgment day and grounded us until we wept, but Cousin W always stood by in the shadows laughing.

Now as a grown up I know her better than I knew her then.
Evil.

Now since I'm all married and settled she's off to look for a husband of her own but to no use, for Cousin W was not pretty, not smart, and not popular. She never changed her style, stuck to her prim -This is right- baggy jeans, floral shirts, and prim flats, she never changed a shade of lipstick, never painted her nails, never even dyed her hair.
And when we did all that we were...
what did she call us last time?
Oh yes. "Byaaasrr."

Cousin W always paraded about how the boys fell hands and feet at her incoming, many had plead for her hand in marriage but she had refused them because her highness had outranked them all.
She always described herself as "Jamaaly mala w900f!" and "Fdaaitny."
In the midst of tens of gorgeous girls that watched her with inward envy speaking the same thought in they're heads "Ya laaaytny 3ndy thara mn thegathaa"

When a boy was following us in the mall, Cousin W would always state with the utmost confidence, "Ma 6a7at 3ayna mn yom shafny!! Lw3 chbdy wa ohwa yla7gny!" ><
And the rest of us would sigh and walk on, there was no end to this.

Last night I was conversing with another cousin about her and found out another tidbit about Cousin W.
The two were in a wedding when a lady came by to speak to my other cousin, "Hessaa mashalla 9ayra sh7lwch tyaneneeen!" and when the lady passed them, Cousin W turned to her and said "T7acheech inty o elgmaar yamch?! Hathy akeed yanat!"

I fell down laughing at the story, this girl is unbelievable.
I rather doubt that anyone's got such a character in the family. Consider yourself lucky.

Friday 20 August 2010

Monsieur Pierre.


I decided to mention a little tidbit of my teenage years, not exactly but very close to a story of my first crush.




It was march, wind had come to play against her face, and she refused to give in and wake up, she snuggled deeper into her covers, and turned the other side away from her window, a dream in her head of the loveliest specimen known to mankind.

Ahhh! Monsieur Pierre.

Tall, slightly tanned, with brownish blond hair and green eyes the color of wet leaves.
He had reminded her of a disney-like prince charming, he had always greeted her with a smile a friendly "Bonjour" in that heavenly language of his.

She had flunked her midterm because she was so preoccupied watching him seated at his desk going through some papers, reading the documents with interest she longed he'd show her.

If only she was french! She had thought, she could flirt with him in his own language and not stutter like an idiot trying to form a sentence, and still he had always been so patient with her.
When she finally did manage to speak for herself he turned to the rest of the class and exclaimed, "Ecoute!! Ecoute!!" She had been so proud of herself then, but when she finally had gotten back home her thoughts turned to a horrifying turn that perhaps he had thought she was indeed helpless and could not believe that he had finally succeeded in making her converse.

She decided to throw that thought out of her head, he had liked her enough to turn to the rest of the class to say that.
Yes, he had liked her.

When it was finally the last day of classes, she had found out she had gotten a gleaming "B+" and the daunting announcement that Monsieur Pierre will be going back to France.

No.
Was the first word that came to mind, how could she go on with such an existence.

And he had looked so young then, with his dark jeans, and a simple white shirt, his hair lightly brushed.
"P-pour quoi allez-vois?!" she had managed, and he had smiled at her insistence in conversing with him in french, "I have work there, mon ami." he replied politely, and turned to speak with his many students leaving her clutching her notebook to her chest, a breaking heart underneath, he had mentioned that he would toast them with champagne, but since they were non-drinkers, he had respected that, but inwardly she had not minded tasting the drink for him.

Before the class was dismissed he had written his email on the board, promising he would reply to anyone of them if they needed him, and she had written the precious address with the most urgency for fear it would be wiped away..

Soon she was found before her computer typing away quotes she had found in books, and some romantic ones and had sent it over to him. Hoping he'd be enthralled by her discoveries of the language.

But it was a week later that she had gotten the news.
"WHAT?! He was going back to get married!!" She had intoned in a voice that rang through the halls, her eyes awash with jealous fury, "He said so. He told us, he was Va se marier." "He had even put it in a sentence!" her friends had informed her laughing.

She had gotten a severe stomach ache that day, but she did not cry.

Now, with the winds tugging at her hair, pulling her upwards, she relented and gotten up with a smile on her face, her eyes awash with new adventure, a chuckle on her lips because of her fruitless infatuation with a man that regarded her like a helpless little sister. He had been wonderful.

A total gentleman in every aspect.


(He was half spanish, and had gotten back to marry his fiance who reportedly was ugly, that atleast softened the blow, but he really was the kindest person ever, and had been so helpful, all the rest of my tutors were boring, ugly, or impatient thus I never really gotten a grasp of the language. I wish him well wherever he is. I can't say he was my only crush! there were many after him. :P)

Wednesday 11 August 2010

Once there was a boy.




Once upon a time there lived a boy, who liked to run like the wind, sneak a bite from a plate without his mother's knowledge, wouldn't rest until he found what he was looking for.

He enjoyed fishing, swimming, football anything that would drive him to laugh his breath away, he adored his friends like brothers, and would often enjoy competing for the girl.

Every girl except the one.

This one...Ahhh, Her.

She had been too bookish, he thought with a smirk, too high and mighty for anyone, especially his kind.
He knew from her sniffly little nose that she detested his presence but there was something about her, he watched her stash her books away as if they were jewels of a foreign land, so carefully.
He recalled.
He had towered over her, but she still managed to look him down, as if he was an insect she longed to squash.

Ouch. He had laughed.

He didn't mind it then, he was so preoccupied with her hands, little hands that would hold each page like a tender lover, running her fingers against the words, sighing at an unknown author.

He wished he could write then, perhaps she'd find him more appealing if he could.
But he was never a man of words, he could sweet talk his way, yes. But he wasn't that Byron person she was always raving about.
So he did what he always did, just stared at her back, watching her curly black hair sway from side to side.
She had such pretty hair, He recalled.
But when she turned to him, it was her eyes that caught him off guard, big brown eyes, that always reminded him of melted chocolate, wide, questioning and ravishing. She did not have that innocent doe eyed look, no.
These were eyes of courage.

Memories. He shook his head, what use was it to remember?

What use was there to remember a woman, a girl, that was never to be his?

But he couldn't forget.

Never that.

It was the first time he had known real hurt, it wasn't a broken bone, or a wound at his wrist.
No, his heart had bled that day.

That far away day, when he had wanted to come, knock on her door and claim her as his wife,she had told him that she did not want him, just like she was refusing a plate of broccoli, She had hated broccoli.

How he had ached then, He still remembered how he had sounded.

Pathetic. He thought with gritted teeth.

He had thought it was the end, thought that he would never stand again, too broken to move, he was never the rich one, and he had never been ashamed of it until he had known what she had wanted.

She had wanted money, something he did not have much of.
She had wanted a Porsche.
A place called "Bags".
And Paris.

She had wanted things.

Obviously things that were more important to her than his heart, Why? He had asked achingly.

She had disposed of him, so easily. It was just like her.

So harsh.

And here he stood looking out a busy street from an open window, his blueprint plans of a new project lay forgotten on the table, different architectural instruments scattered about the highly important papers.
Wind played through the short strands of his dark hair, a cigaret clamped between his lips, a vision of a girl in his head.

He was eternally changed after that, no longer laughing, no longer inquisitive, he had been fire, now he was ice.

Slowly he turned away, stuffing pictures of hands, books, and curles out of his mind.

A dream forgotten.

Monday 9 August 2010

Visions of Petra

It was too late for prayers, the priests were brooding at his approach, it would not do for a royal to be so lacking towards the gods. Especially one so close to fall , His long robes swayed about his hurried stride, his limbs were old but he could still hold himself high, the few greying hairs at his head did not slow him, As He approached Obodas, a small crowd came away, and He was let to settle down in front of his favorite deity.
It has happened again, They've come once more, I know not if tis for punishment or warning, The red robes I fear are everywhere, they claim this whole city now, I am merely a puppet, one that they would like to tear into nothingness, Please help me, Lord. They're plague in thine city is endless, I have always been respectful, submitted to your every rule, and had no regrets, Grand Obodas, You are all, You over all, Please, Rid us of they're greed. Take them away.
It was those last words he spoke aloud that made him grit his teeth in helplessness, For his hollow voice did not have the fierceness it used to , he did not hold much strength with a sword as he used to, By the gods...He was too pampered for all that now, too weak and helpless, and he doubted any of his men would stand behind him now, not against this, not against Rome.
Yes, the creme de la creme of all was after his little stone city, Hmph...they did not care a whit for it before its prosper, They did not care when it was a measly crack in the sands.

Ah, But now...Now, all wanted his grand sculpture, But they did not merely want it, No. They were out for possession. And of course they were expected to let down they're gates and welcome them in with open arms for fear of combating they're armed legions. Yes, He had to admit it. It was suicide to go against those masked men, He was in the age of lions and he was merely a fat lamb they wanted to take in.

All eyes were upon his front at his approach and at his back at his leave, they knew it was a matter of days before they're dear sire disappears, All were ready to give in, if it was for the safety of they're children and women...what whit would anyone care for a pampered king? Of course he'd be over thrown. At best he'd be a puppet king, one that the bigger force could twist around they're little finger.

Yes, Possibilitie; but all were dire in war. Suggestions that would all lead to they're downfall and so to they're decline.. They would not speak they're Aramaic tongue anymore, but be forced to change they're formations into Latin. They're children would never speak they're mothers tongue but be Roman slaves like all nearby cities.

"Can't be helped, King Aaron know's its for the best." Said the elderly monk to his fellow priests, "They'd want him dead for sure, he's not puppet material like Heera's sultan." replied another younger fellow, " But what would happen to us? I have children." replied another in an overly emotional tone. "Us?! Were safe of threats since were not military men or royalty, its those with the power that are in real danger. Ironic, but true."said a middle aged man with a stoic posture.

Ironic, Yes.
There was a time when he was a force to be reckoned with, at least to his subjects, now he was gossiped about like some fool.
He raised his chin and stepped between the crowds, his robes pulled over his shoulder, the color of his clothing melted with the city's pink stone, and it seemed for a moment that he was one with these walls.

He raised a hand to what few alliances he had, and asked if they would open the gates to welcome they're adversary.
Soon every tongue was robbed of words, and every man,woman, and child retreated far back to the sidelines, allowing a clear view of the distant army.
As he had foreseen a sea of crimson and steel was marching his way, to him. It was death and it was approaching quickly, he swallowed again and again, sweat trickled down his spine as he heard the Bam,Bam,Bam of they're footsteps, so hard and sure.

Soon they halted just a few feet away, and a tiny man stood out between the large warriors, he held out a scroll and began reading it, one would describe him as plain ugly, but there was something sinister in the way he looked about the city, his mouth parted and gave away to a crooked tooth smile, it was nerve racking, his leer over his treasures was obvious, he was definitely the Legate. The senior officer of the Roman Legion in which he's appointed as the governor of a roman province.
In this case Petra was at a turning point to be just that.

"Greetings, I am Dante Severus, I come baring a message from the great emperor of Rome."Said the Legate.
"His eminence commands the patrons of the stone city to relent at once, The area surrounding you is already governed by our esteemed emperors rule, you are the last to join. My compliments on your decision to spare your people, very wise." said Dante with a smirk

King Aaron looked on, he was quiet and reserved yet to say a word to speak his mind, and he did not plan to. To speak the mind one has to be free of the imaginary chains that seemed to lick at his neck.

The Legate could not keep his escalated excitement from showing, he held a hand to the hilt of his sword, and flicked his fingers with the other, at the mere sound of it two brawny warriors stepped into view and stepped up the short stairs to King Aaron, they held his hands fastened behind his back, and pulled him into the darkness behind the opened doors of the palace, Nobody seemed to protest instead they clutched at they're robes and children with shivering awe.

Make it swift.
He prayed with deep breath, he tried to ignore his fears, tried to ignore that he was fastened and dispositioned, all he could hope for now was a swift death, just a swing of a sword and it would be all over.

He could hear the slow footsteps that followed him, It seemed that the Legate had all the time in the world to make him suffer a bit more, "Lovely." He said looking up at the shaded walls decorated with carved ornaments.
"You know tis not usual for a leader to be granted a grand favor, leaders like you are simply beheaded outside they're city's walls and buried out to be forgotten." Dante continued tapping a finger at his lips, "I think I shall enjoy a bit of change...perhaps a public audience? Very poetic."

It would not do to clutch ones fist and grit ones teeth at the suggestions the Legate was thinking, But Aaron did not think, he did it anyway.
There was one thing he was thankful about. His lack of wife and children.
If he had any, those pigs would relish torturing the hell out of him with something like that at they're disposal.
Which brought something else to mind as well. All that he had lived for, and relived for, and tackled, fixed, and built, was all for naught, It was all a pawn now, something he had invested all his life and youth into just to be taken away so simply.

He cursed himself, his own weakness for what had been brought down at him, Nothing was worth anything after all.
He was not worth anything.
He was a stone, unoriginal and easily replaced.

They knew where to pick at him, hurt him where it hurts the most, but he still stood quiet, what use would it do to speak? What use would it do to protest? What use would it be to try to fight they're iron grip.
All for nothing.

He heard they're whispers in latin, he understood enough that it was soon time, he was tired and weary, it would do him good to just let go of this misery.
Soon.

People outside were looking about themselves, women held they're children to they're breasts, men stood in silence onlooking, elders were beginning to protest only to be pushed back to not be heard.
This was not a bloodfest, if they stood docile they'd be treated like the silent lambs they are.
But only one Baa would cost them all they're life.

Soon the tall, broad doors parted and soon he was pushed out by the same burly warriors that had taken him in, he walked on shivering feet, his eyes to the sun, blinded by its brightness, for it did well to block the red robes from the corners of his eyes.
Death was ideal now, a step to climb on the central platform, a swish of a sword, and all would be over.

His stride unbalanced but he managed to hold him self high, his tall frame helped him accomplish it, his hair unkept with the sudden gust of wind that tore by him, his robes seemed to wrap about his legs and then fasten around his waist, yet fall again in a usual fashion.
Then he stood, a dark vision blocking the light, Vercingetorix dressed all in black, heaving a large hefty axe hammer, he spoke in a guttural tongue and pushed him down to his knees.

Hands flew over mouths, astonishment flickered through every eye, green, blue, hazel, black, all shades of them were awestruck.
He was the embodiment of Death, Azreal come to take his life.

And with a braced arch, his axe hammer cut through his cords, and his lifeless head fell to the ground in an echo where it rolled to silence.

That same sound echoed through the valley of stones, down to the treasury up to the mount of Aaron, and onwards resonated through the cries of his people.

Saturday 7 August 2010

Once there was a girl.

Once upon a time there was a girl, who was brought up to do all right and no wrong, she enjoyed her studies, laughed with her friends, and read all the books she could find.

She enjoyed drinking hot milk with honey with a book on her lap, she enjoyed the scarce rainy days, where she'd sit against a couch and listen to the rain dribble outside her window.

She loved the sight of droplits on the glass, a vision that had always left her giddy with warmth.

Slim, tall, with sleek dark hair, he used to smile at her and watch her stack her books away, teased her about her glasses, and remarked that she should eat her sandwich before he did.
she remembered that he liked melted cheese on cold bread.

Perhaps she'd make it now.

Perhaps not.

It was in a hot summer's day, where she learned he befriended another girl, she scoffed and laughed the matter off her shoulders, she wasn't brought up to fall in love after all, and the notion was foreign as snow to her.

Love=Trouble in her book. It was an equation she wished not to join in, for there was no pleasant ending to the matter, she wasn't an idealistic princess, and he was certainly not prince charming.

Oh, he had many faults, Too many, she decided primly, and it would not do to waste time on him.

However, why did the memory of his white smile make her heart flutter?

Why was it-when he walked into a room he would make everyone blur in the background?

Why was it when he was with another girl, her breath caught?

Why was she thinking this now?

She should move on.

Would- Move on.

She couldn't stay struck on a dream, a man, a boy that was never to be hers.

After all there were prospects to consider:
He would never buy her a Porsche.
He would never fly her to Paris on they're anniversary.
He would never take her on a shopping trip to Saks.

Never, Never.

And here she stood looking out a lonely room, watching passers go by in wonderment...

But what if?

What would it be like?

What would it be like to have him here?
How did it feel for him to hold her?
How did he smell?

God, she couldn't remember.

Was it strong cologne, or peppermint?

Cologne, she decided.
She liked the smell.

Would he like the simple yellow dress she was wearing?
Or would he insist on the red ensemble, that still hung in her closet untouched?

She remembered, he couldn't even pronounce the brand's name, "Channel." he had said, scoffing at the more correct name of the iconic brand.

She recalled a night of far away, a broken voice on the other end of the phone, "W-Why?"he had asked like a little boy begging to know what he did wrong.

She had informed him she did not want anything to do with him anymore,

So cold.

So harsh.

Just like her, she thought grimly.

And here she stood looking out a beautifully furnished room, riches in her closet, and a Porshe down in her garage, just as she had always wished for.

she heard footsteps behind her, and turned to pose a smile at the elderly man, he had come to inform her that she was needed downstairs, "I'm coming, darling."she said kindly to her elderly husband.

All thoughts of a dream buried in her head.

Monday 19 July 2010

Riffa3

This post goes to my profound love for that little bit of land in center Bahrain, I love you.

I adore how every one is related somehow to another, I laugh at teenagers who think they're big bad men with they're sporty cars, and tobacco. I smile when I see an old lady helped into her car by her loving family, I relax at the many little cold stores that are so helpful they'd come out to get your order (I MISS THAT!) I feel pride when I reply, "I am from Riffa.", I reminisce about the old days, running under the newly bloomed berry tree in my grandmother's backyard, plucking all the red ones out before they turn black. I miss racing with the boys.

I wonder about an old childhood love I had, then slowly shake my head to bury the old memories...
So much has changed.

We've changed.

And here I wish I could turn back the time, staying that little girl snuggling against my fathers arm, recalling how I thought he was the handsomest man I had ever seen, with his tall fit frame, his dark hair and slightly tanned skin, his laughing eyes, his many gifts, that old dusty military uniform in his closet.
I miss you.

Take me back to Riffa3. <3

Sunday 18 July 2010

Lady Lady


The other day I went to get my nails done at the mall, I thought I'd stop by the bookstore before going in my appointment, I picked up a book by one of my favorite authors and preceded to the counter it was then that I spotted the rack, on it were tens of children's dvds and some of the most notorious cartoons of my time, I instantly picked up a boxset of my then favorite cartoon (And still is) Lady Lady. <3

I was instantly reminded of my childhood memories watching it, it was such a delightful experience then, the series had such strong values and a good walkthrough for girls of all ages, It was such a shame that such works are not continued to being produced to this day, of course everyone do have they're preferences but this show was something I'd always wanted to share with my daughter and the thought of her not enjoying it as well as I did never crossed my mind...It made me think, why do our standards seem to shrink with every year come by? Why don't we look for the deeper meaning of things? Is it because people are growing more shallow by every minute? Was romance dead? Or have we just become more cynical of life?

I just wish that such bittersweet and strong feminine works would continue to be introduced.

Don't you just miss the old days?

Saturday 17 July 2010

The goulish wedding

Last night I had a social obligation to attend a wedding ;the invite came for one of my in laws acquaintances, I thought to wear something simple, so I scrambled through my closet to find something suitable, in an instant I remembered a simple red Jenny Packham dress that I had never worn previously and had been a gift to me by my husband on valentines, It wasn't exactly my style but I thought it would be a sweet way to surprise him before I attended the wedding, and it did, anyhow I'm running off course here but I thought I'd relate everything of last night's adventure, Anyhow my ensemble looked good with the silver heels and a studded clutch, Usually my in laws take it to extremes to dress for such occasions, the weddings I've so far attended were an array of couture gowns displayed on very stylish young ladies, and classy interiors run down to the smallest details.Thus I didn't think this wedding would be much less although I had been informed it was a "Bedu" wedding. I merely thought they had bedu origins like the rest of us, but BOY! I was in for a surprise.

When I walked in I was met with a glare of the shabby hall lights, it was like going into a high school cafeteria, the women were dressed in....-No, scratch that I cannot begin to describe it.
It was horrible! They're makeup reminded me of an 80's take on vampires, they're hair was done up and curled and straightened and then curled again and pulled up on a mountain over they're heads. That was the least of it of course, the brga3 wearing women (Oh, Yea) with they're eyes tinted in and out with blue eye shadow, were a nightmare, something out of a horror movie, and they kept glaring at everyone else...I mean were all female, take that thing off!

The hardest thing to do was not to laugh, I know I may sound like a complete ass but when the music started they looked like a stamped jumping here and there, dancing with complete confidence, I had to put my hand on my mouth, put my head against my sister's in law neck and when a little boy with his thob cuffs turned over his elbows, his getra in a complete mess over his head and his mother -who looked like the witch of the west come for revenge- pulled him along with all the pride shinning in her face, I just couldn't help but burst out laughing.

It was a joke! And when I started to imagine the horror the bride must be if these were the "Family" I cringed inside, And then looking down at my watch I noticed it was already close to 12 and the bride hadn't announced her entry, usually it was around that time, I tapped my heels waiting for her to come in, the sooner she was here the better, I seriously wanted to get out of there by then.

When the time passed I was so impatient I turned to S, "Wayn el3roos?"
S, "Msh jaya...3ndhm 3ayb td5al."
I was stunned, WTH! the bride entry was considered inappropriate when all these women were jumping around, dressed in the most vulgar dresses imaginable?!
Talk about double standards!

Needless to say after that proclamation, we decided that there was no more to see, with that we thanked our hosts, said goodbye to the family and walked out to the car, we left just as they announced dinner, which must've been another horror.

Good riddance to that!!

Friday 16 July 2010

fruitless thoughts.

Today, I've had a major writing block, I am in the process of writing my own novel, but I keep losing tracks of where I'm going with the story at hand. >:(

I know my plot, I know my characters, they're right there in my head, walking about, crossing a road, talking, everything's there except I can't seem to bring it into words like I usually do, Perhaps its my internal turmoil with life. I am unsatisfied, but being mentally troubled often brings about inspiration, so here's hoping. There's the fact that I haven't been sleeping very well and my thoughts have been tracing back to someone who has gotten on my nerves that I have an itch to actually smash something.
Anyhow never mind my ruthless thoughts, the heat has gotten under my skin it seems, and theres the fact that I'm not traveling for a while...
Just kill me, god.

Saturday 10 July 2010

If I had all the money in the world...




There's a phrase that crosses everyone's minds! I for one am a dreamer if I had enough money to hit the shops an buy whatever I could possibly want, and get away with it and still buy some more!

Here's a few of the things I would get. >:D



THE ORANGE BIRKIN.
I want mine with gold hardware though (Etshar6!) looool
I've seen a bigger birkin on a cousin of mine with a flashy orange I'm not a huge Hermes fan but I knew I wanted that bag on the spot! perhaps in the upcoming year...That is if I can actually find one! :/ (I'm not the kind to splurge that much on a bag, since I kinda get bored of them but I thought it would be such a lovely hand me down for my daughter in the future. <3>




THE XL Classic Chanel Jumbo
Now I know this isn't very far up as an Hermes, but I thought I'd get your opinion fashionista's!
Do you think its tacky to buy a vintage Chanel? Basing this on a khaleeji point of view of course, I consider it to be a classic either way and would love to own this particular model but I really don't want to feel bad after getting it...any advice?



My own Condo in Japan!
Ahhh, If only! I know its not a conventional dream, but I have always wanted to go there/live there for as far as I can remember, I really don't care where I just want it to be a destination every now and then. <3


Can you imagine having a picnic under this picturesque scene?!


I know what your thinking but my natural trail of thoughts on money goes back to clothes and accessories...and a place you could put them in. :D
The Closet, I just adore this model, I know some prefer that of MC but her's is not a closet more like my house so I'm being realistic and hoping to convert one of the rooms into this someday :D


-Sigh- Just take me there...<3


An apartment in the champs-elysees!
Perfect summer destination! <3>
J'adore Paris!


Well, thats all I can think of...hehehe I can think of a lot honestly but I doubt this little blog would do in unveiling my most ridiculous fantasies! :P you never know I may just start projecting in actually making them come true. :D


Thursday 24 June 2010

Women -_-

I don't understand how some women constantly remind people that "Hey! 3yaly...o bayty a'3ayr feeh, o ana msafra o bo__ jaybly sa3a " o whatever, Nobody cares. Why do you have to rub it in?! y3ny hatha a9ln 3aks eldeen, o there are usually people who aren't married or just starting out and marriage is already hard enough without that sort of mindless babble going, there's no need to show off your "Perfect Life" or whatever which I doubt it is a9ln perfect.
Y3ny 3ala elkel bel3afya, o I'm the sort of person that appreciates someone with the sort of class in communicating with things other than the materialistic and the personals.
If god made you a Have, than you should thank him and get on with it, dress up enjoy the wealth and everything but don't rub it into msakeen el have nots.
Seriously people! Don't you hate it when your sitting down for dinner in a gathering and some women constantly turn it into a brag fest? Why?! I don't get it...sure I've got my share of loubies and designer dresses bs I've never actually talked about it :/
Y3ny laysh? I buy them for me...not to show it off to people.
O sure some of the people mentioned have way more than me going bs shouldn't they be the classier ones? shouldn't the have lesses be the braggers coz they're not as used to it as they are?

Monday 7 June 2010

Yoma...

I heard the phone ring and ignored it writing the previous post, when I got around to looking at my phone I received this message,

"T9b7een 3ala 5air 7beebty masma3t 9otch fdaytch allah lay5leeny mnch wala mn 7abaybch"

Aww Mom, I miss you. ;(

Monday 31 May 2010


I have just finished watching 'Tess of the D'ubervilles' and its one sad thing, I would go on and on about the story here, but Its a pretty famous one, though depressing.

I was fascinated by the actress who played the herione, Gemma Arterton, she was so flawlessly beautiful and so talented.
It was something about her voice, I'm used to her in her role in Prince of Persia and Clash of the Titans she had a softer voice, but here its so sad and sobby-(Annoying at times as well.) :P

Looks like Britain's fueling more talent into Hollywood.


Sunday 30 May 2010

Rainy days.





I always loved the rain, the sound, the feel, the color of the sky when it pours, the freshness of the earth and how it colors the trees. Being the desert dwellers that we are, Rain is a blessing.


On days like that, there's nothing I'd love more than a cup of tea, a comfortable couch by an open window and a romance novel -


Specifically "Something Wonderful" by Judith Mcnaught,
"Every season of the year comes a promise that something wonderful is going to happen to me someday. I've had that feeling ever since grandfather died. It's as if he's telling me to wait for it. In winter , the promise comes with the smell of snow in the air. In summer, I hear it in the boom of thunder and the lightning that streaks across the sky in blue flashes. Most of all, I feel it now, in springtime when everything is green and black- you know, like tree trunks when they're wet, and freshly tilled fields that smell like--" she inhaled trying to recall the exact scent.

I just love that scene.
51pUF91emJL._BO2,204,203,200_PIsitb-sticker-arrow-click,TopRight,35,-76_AA300_SH20_OU01_.jpgHas anyone read that book?